I find that many of us will hear a phrase or saying and like the meaning that’s been given to the expression. We use what we hear from someone else because we are in agreement with what was said. I remember a girlfriend of mine using the phrase, “my tank is empty.” She used this phrase to express that she could not give anymore because the belief was she was constantly giving and not receiving anything in return from the other person. I related to what she said and I was in agreement with her story because the love I learned as a child had conditions. I also, believed if I kept giving to others I’d be accepted by them. I remember saying the same phrase a couple of times after hearing my girlfriend use it.
Since I’ve been on my spiritual journey of transformation, I’ve learned much of what I accepted for myself is lies. One of the biggest lies, which we accept is love and approval, comes from others in order for us to feel good and believe we are important. Instead we must teach, love is what we are because Love created each of us therefore we are already accepted. We must teach no one is more special or more important than another regardless of race, nationality, age, profession or language one speaks. We must teach respect, not necessarily in a sense of yes ma’am, no ma’am, and yes sir and no sir but respect for the Divine Spirit that resides deep within in each of us no matter what action one has done.
I see there comes a point in one’s life while living on this earth that he or she will have to be a parent to him or her self in order to be the change they wish to see in the world. I see if I do not do this, than I will keep seeking what I long for from others and continue to experience the same emotional pain. I must fill myself up with truths that come from God along with loving and accepting all of me, not just the me that perhaps did something good but even the me that made choices which didn’t support others and myself or simply myself. This is unconditional love. We do not have to agree or approve of the action although we can be open minded to understand when someone acts out of fear that the person is thinking from his or her wrong mind and disconnected from God.
We can only know our true self by learning about our Creator and truly understand the meaning that each of us was created in the image of God and be willing to look at our false self. Our false self are the beliefs we accept that are lies and patterns, that have been handed down from generations that keep us in darkness as well as the mask we wear to hide behind in order to appear a particular way in front of others. My mask is appearing to be perfect. If I’m perfect than I’ll be loved and accepted. Who can be perfect in this world! No one and I’ve held onto this belief for too long and so the death of perfect Pam has taken longer than I’d like! 🙂
I must heed my seeker within because she awaits and desires an empty can. Who is my seeker within? She’s the little girl who believes she wasn’t loved and accepted and learned that she needed love and approval from others in order to feel good about herself. The last two lines of my poem refer to the sweetness of living life here on earth. When I accept the truths that come from the Creator for myself and then give them away by showing up from these truths and sharing what I’ve received, the joy within me overflows.